Chuckle #417 | August 18th, 2010
Napping Our Way to Economic Recovery
A good nap is a glorious thing. I love those delicious moments between waking and sleeping and that deep drowsy feeling. Your eyelids feel as heavy as cement blocks and you know that just minutes separate you from a deep sleep – in the middle of the day. That’s how a perfect afternoon NAP begins.
Some Americans believe that napping is, well, un-American. I mean, look where it’s gotten Europe’s PIGS. It’s no coincidence that the countries in the most financial distress are those in which people regularly waste away entire afternoons in blissful siesta (and prefer their beverages without ice.)
Call me a crackpot theorist, but consider this. If certain nations had spent a little less time napping, they might now find themselves in less of an economic pickle.
Sure, those well-rested citizens might have sunnier dispositions than us, but their economies are in the proverbial toilet. Let’s face it, if you spend 1/6th of your potential working hours asleep, it’s going to have a negative effect on GDP. Trust me, I’ve tried to buy a bottle of wine in Italy between 2PM and 6PM. It can’t be done. If they would just give up just ½ their afternoon nap, the balance of payments would even out.
I can’t believe that the IMF or the World Bank, the Group of Eight/Twenty, or at the very least, the non-napping very productive euro-zone dominating GERMANS, haven’t imposed some kind of nap reduction requirement as part of the debt re-negotiations.
Why am I the first person to suggest this path to economic recovery? Probably because I am a mom. And probably because I haven’t been brainwashed by any real macro-economic training.
I’m not saying that we should completely eliminate the afternoon nap. I like a good nap as much as the next person. It’s a beautiful thing. The midday NAP can improve moods and increase productivity, for everyone from preschoolers to presidents. Every mother knows this.
Everyone wakes up refreshed from a nap, even a 20 minute nap. (Back in the 80s this was called “power napping” and you were supposed to do it at your desk.) It was the topic of several books that purported to increase the productivity of the American worker. For some reason, it never really took off. Americans are too self-conscious to sleep in public. Most of us also won’t wear monokinis in the Riviera for the same reason.
I urge the economic powers of the world to action. As some guy once said…“This is the moment. This is our time.”
To save the world from financial ruin, we must harness the power of the nap. The American worker must learn to nap. The citizens of certain European nations should learn to nap less. (Americans should also continue to wear tank-suits in Cannes for the good of everyone.)
How much nap is the right amount? I’ll leave that to the economists who have the most experience with this sort of thing. The one’s who totally get what I’m talking about…the ones with kids.
